


I'm Breaking While You Fall Asleep

by ChocolateCapCookie



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Anxiety, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Depressed Steve Rogers, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, I didnt realize that last one til I was done im so sorry, Implied Sexual Content, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, References to Depression, Slow Burn, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Undiagnosed Anxiety Disorder, and ptsd, he's also a good bro, what else do i tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-05-16 03:33:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19309777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChocolateCapCookie/pseuds/ChocolateCapCookie
Summary: If he had suspected something was up with Steve before, now he's practically confirmed it. This was not the Steve Rogers he knew before the war; this was a panicked, nervous version of him that Tony had never seen before, ever. Even in the worst, most terrifying situations, they look to Captain America to keep a cool head. So why is he suddenly this shaking, nervous guy who said "sorry" more times in the span of five seconds than Tony has in his entire life? How did Tony manage to turn Captain Freaking America into a nervous wreck with a stupid, self-deprecating joke? What the hell was going on with Steve Rogers?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is in the tags, but SPOILERS FOR AVENGERS ENDGAME, PLEASE DON'T READ AHEAD. DON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELVES
> 
> This fic isn't technically Endgame compliant, but practically everything in it happens, and this is the aftermath. Morgan doesn't exist, Pepper and Tony aren't a thing, Cap never passes on the title (sorry, Sam!) and Tony obviously doesn't die.
> 
> This is my first fic on here, so ya know. Sorry about any mistakes, point 'em out in the comments so I can fix 'em. Pls be nice guys, I will love you forever.
> 
> Title is from Alex and Sierra's "Little Do You Know", which I swear I listened to more than a million times while writing this. Is a great song!
> 
> Okay I’ll shut up now, hope you like it!

It's been three whole weeks since the Battle of Earth, as the news is calling it. Three whole weeks for Tony to come to terms with everything that happened. Three weeks to rest, relax and overcome the damage he did to his body with that gauntlet. Three weeks for him to stay out of the public eye, and mourn everyone he did lose in the long, convoluted war against Thanos; not just in this last battle but in all the battles that lead up to that moment (He'd bet his entire company that Natasha and Gamora are being badasses together in Heaven, and probably meeting up for margaritas afterwards.)

Of course, being Tony Stark, he doesn't do any of that. The day after the battle, reporters are already hounding the entrance to the new Compound, trying to be the first to get any snippet of news about what happened. It's understandable, considering half the population of Earth simply reappeared after five years, and claiming to have met the Avengers; people must have been going crazy wondering what was happening. Tony doesn't push away the reporters, doesn't give a scripted written report to make them fuck off of his property. Instead, he invites them in, shows them exactly what the damage is, and gives them every single detail and tidbit they want. He even ropes the other Avengers into doing little interviews.

The others are surprisingly okay with talking to the media. Tony supposes they feel the same way he does, anxious to let the world know what happened, not for praise or credit, but simply because it is too much to keep inside (not that he'd ever admit it if anyone asked.) Talking to the reporters is surprisingly therapeutic: the Avengers aren't holding back or being bottled up, and after almost five years of this shit, it feels SO GOOD to just let it all out, which is probably why none of them refused interviews after the first time. Except for Steve.

Steve Rogers, the stupid, idiotic, worthy-of-wielding-Mjölnir fool that is Captain America, is never to be seen in these interviews. The media has picked up on it at this point, of course, and theories about why he hasn’t been seen since the battle float around the internet almost more than the actual news. They range from being somewhat sane (Steve was wounded in battle and now he’s ashamed to show his disfigured face) to downright ludicrous (Cap was secretly in a relationship with Thanos and is now so depressed at the loss of his lover that he doesn’t leave his room.) These stories are amusing, and if Tony had any spare time at all he’d entertain himself trying to read all of them, but he knows that they don’t come anywhere close to the real reason: Steve Rogers simply doesn’t want to.

When Tony first asked the group to talk to the media, everyone had basically the same reaction: a resounding NO, which was of course to be expected. However, he managed to coax everyone into doing at least one (except the Spider-kid – no way was he going to put Peter in a position where his identity might be even slightly compromised), and now the team basically owes his all their worldly assets, for how well it worked out. The only person he hadn’t been able to persuade was Steve, who, when Tony first approached him with the idea, just gave him a “What the FUCK” look, and went back to helping orphan victims of the snap, or whatever the fuck it was that he was doing.

Tony’s not exactly surprised by this: Steve has always tended to be a guarded, private person. He honestly cannot picture the guy travelling around the US doing stage shows in that costume that looked like it was designed by a five-year-old. But really, he seems to be taking the whole 'avoid the media' thing a little too far, considering - has Tony mentioned this before - IT'S BEEN THREE WHOLE FUCKING WEEKS.

Fine. Whatever. Maybe Steve just needs  _four_ weeks to get back to normal. A solid month. After all this whole thing was a traumatic event; he can't really expect Steve to bounce back as quickly as the others, right?

 

*******

 

Three months after the battle, life returns to an almost-normal state. The Avengers still live together in the new Compound, which is another of Stark Industries' warehouses repurposed to be a living spot. They haven't been on any missions, maybe because SHIELD wants to give them a break, or maybe the supervillians of the world are still adjusting to the post-reversal world. Somehow, Tony doubts it's the former.

Peter finally started going back to school, and after a rough few days in the beginning, it's been going smoothly. Tony almost didn't want to let him go - having someone you love die in your arms tends to make you irrationally overprotective. However, even he wasn't stupid enough to stop the kid from continuing his education, and he compromised by having the kid and his hot aunt move into the Compound, for his peace of mind, if nothing else.

Wanda has stopped randomly exploding things with her signature red magic, which she used to do constantly whenever she had a panic attack. Bruce has managed to interact with people without being afraid he'd suddenly turn into Señor Hulk again. Tony has even learned to tolerate being in the same room as Bucky Barnes without feeling the urge to punch his face in. They haven't spoken to each other directly, but progress is progress. And hey, Tony's letting him have free food and a place to live. Barnes can't really complain.

The Avengers are finally getting their mojo back, everyone's almost calm again. The nightmares and panic attacks have slowed down significantly, and the prospect of returning to normal life doesn't actually feel so outlandish. They've started eating together, hanging out a bit more, and even had two or three team movie nights that went well enough to make them all feel comfortable around each other again. They don't actually feel like a team again yet, but hey, all good things take time. Tony counts this as progress.

It doesn't escape his notice though, that Steve is almost never to be seen included in this. He keeps himself closed off; barely interacting with the others on the rare occasions he's around them. He's still polite and friendly and always looking out for everyone, but he never starts a conversation, never voluntarily joins in with their activities. Classic signs of PTSD and post-battle depression, but Tony's never seen it go on for so long, especially not with Steve, Captain-Hide-Your-Feelings-America. Not that Tony's  _worried_  about Steve or anything, no, he has much better stuff to be doing. He's just curious is all. He just wants to know what went and stuck itself up Cap's ass.

Which is why he finds himself one morning knocking at the door to Steve's room. He's never been to his room before, never had a reason to, and even now it feels somewhat wrong. Is this even allowed? Can he just go knock on the bedroom door of a guy he started a war with and almost killed seven years ago? Nobody ever taught him the social etiquette for this kind of situation.

However, before Tony can overthink himself to death, the door opens and he's faced with six feet and two inches of manly body. Manly body that's dripping wet and only wearing a towel. Tony's brain feels like it's short-circuited, because all he can think is  _daaammnnn_  like some horny teenager. He doesn't know how long he's been staring at Steve's body - it feels like hours - but he's shaken out of it when Steve goes, "Um. Tony?"

Oh yeah. He came here for a reason. The reason NOT being Steve's gorgeous body. He tears his eyes away and focuses upwards.

"Morning, Cap. I'm sorry, I didn't know you were taking a shower, you want me to come back later?"

"No, it's fine, just give me a few minutes to get some clothes on?" Steve smiles shyly at Tony and closes the door. Tony wants to bang on the door and yell  _NO! This conversation will be so much more enjoyable for me if you don't have clothes on!_ but appropriately restrains himself until Steve opens the door again and gestures him in.

Once he's inside, Tony wants to smack himself in the face. He has no idea what to say, how to start or even where to stand, so he just awkwardly sets his butt on a corner of Steve's bed, trying to formulate words. Luckily, Steve seems to pick up this.

"Not that it's not great to see you Stark, but did you want something?'

"I find the idea that you think I'm only here because I want something to be offensive."

"You've never been here before," Steve points out, which is true.

Tony sighs. "I just, uh, wanted to check up on you. Ya know, after everything. If you're okay and all that."

Steve looks uncharacteristically amused. "Tony Stark checking up on someone? Did that gauntlet give you a full personality change, Stark?"

Tony huffs. "This is why I don't waste my time trying to be nice. Nobody ever appreciates it when I do."

Steve's face falls instantly. It's almost funny how quickly his expression goes from a shy puppy to puppy-that's-just-shit-on-the-floor. "No shit, Tony, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. Shit, I'm sorry, I-"

'Calm down, Capsicle," Tony says, cutting him off. "That was a joke."

"Right, right, sorry." Steve rubs a hand over his tired face. "I'm fine, Tony. Really. It's been like three months now, everything's cool."

"Your serious overreaction earlier doesn't seem like you're cool," Tony points out.

"Yeah, sorry, I'm just tired. I was going to take a nap now actually, and yeah."

Tony can recognize a dismissal when he sees it, so even though he's unwilling to leave without further seeing if Steve's fine, he gets up and walks towards the door. Before he leaves, he turns around and faces Steve again.

"I know you said you're okay, but if you ever want to talk or anything Rogers, you can always call me okay? Even if you just need....anything."

Steve nods. "Thanks, Tony. Could you close the door when you leave?"

Tony waves back, and closes the door softly so Steve won't be annoyed. Wait, since when does he care about NOT annoying Steve Rogers?

Damn, maybe the gauntlet  _did_ give him a full personality change.

 

 

 _That was not normal,_ is the first thing Tony thinks to himself after. He's back in his lab, but is uncharacteristically not doing any work. Instead, he's sitting down and pondering the two-minute interaction he had with Captain America.

If he had suspected something was up with Steve before, now he's practically confirmed it. This was not the Steve Rogers he knew before the war; this was a panicked, nervous version of him that Tony had never seen before, ever. Even in the worst most terrifying situations, they look to Captain America to keep a cool head. So why is he suddenly this shaking, nervous guy who said "sorry" more times in the span of five seconds than Tony has in his entire life? How did Tony manage to turn Captain Freaking America into a nervous wreck with a stupid, self-deprecating joke?  _What the hell was going on with Steve Rogers?_

God. Stupid Steve had managed to get properly into his head. Tony had much better things to be working on, he wasn't going to waste his time thinking about Steve Rogers' mental problems, or the beautifully sculpted shape of Steve's abs. Or his amazingly well-defined biceps and triceps and every other 'ceps. Or his gorgeous _face_ that looked so good post-shower, with that wet floppy hair, that Tony couldn't stop staring at it. Nope. None of his business. Let Steve Rogers live. He doesn't give a fuck.

 

******

 

It’s been almost six months since the Snap and things are almost back to normal. The Avengers are together, and the world is at peace. So when Tony wakes up in the middle of the night, screaming and tangled in his sheets, no-one’s more surprised than he is.

It doesn’t hit him for a minute; he’s so unsettled when he wakes up that he doesn’t know up from down and left from right, and so he ends up tangling himself in his (very expensive) sheets even more. When his brain finally catches up to his body, he starts remembering in flashes, and he starts crying again. He can’t control it, any of it; not the soft, silent sobs that slip through, the flashes of Thanos’s face, gloating and snapping away half the universe, and most of all, Peter. Oh god,  _Peter._ Tony involuntarily starts crying harder, remembering Peter’s whimpers, his plea to his mentor to help him, his young face frozen in absolute terror as he turns to dust in Tony’s arms. Tony remembers how helpless he felt watching the kid float away, how he’d hoped for half a moment to turn to dust and float away himself, if only to escape all the pain, all the emotion. He remembers the ache he felt when he realized he’d never be able to tell Peter how much he meant to Tony, how much he  _loved_ him. It hurt so much, and now remembering all this, Tony hurts even more.

He doesn’t know how long he’s sat there sobbing into his sheets – it feels like forever to his disoriented brain – but he slowly registers a soft knocking on his door.

“Stark? You okay?”

He doesn’t say anything, hoping that whoever it is takes the hint and pretends he’s sleeping. They don’t.

“Tony? I’m coming in, okay?”

Before he can even register what’s happening, he finds himself surrounded by 250 pounds of supersoldier gently rubbing his back.

“It’s okay Tony, it’s okay, calm down okay? Whatever happened, it was just in your head, everyone’s okay, you’re okay….”

Tony whimpers in Steve’s arms. “Peter,” he chokes out, and immediately bursts into sobs again. Steve understands exactly what he means.

“Calm down Tony, okay please calm down, Peter’s safe, he’s back, he’s sleeping right here in the Tower, you know he is. Kid’s probably hanging himself from the ceiling right now, doing whatever stupid stuff kids get up to these days, especially with all this fancy tech you keep giving him.”

A small giggle forces its way out of Tony, and Steve smiles to himself. Tony’s still crying, but he’s going to be okay.

They sit in silence for a while longer, Steve just holding Tony, until he’s calmed down enough to sit up.

Tony feels horrible about himself. This isn’t the first time someone has caught him having a nightmare or a mental breakdown; hell, it isn’t even the first time Steve’s caught him. Doesn’t make the feeling any better though.

“Cap, I’m really sorry about all this. You can leave, you know, I’m fine, you didn’t have to stay this long…”

Steve smiles softly at him. “Tony, calm down, you didn’t do anything, and I don’t mind.”

Tony sighs and snuggles harder next to him. Even in his messed up state, he subtly tries to feel for Steve’s abs. Hey, he doesn’t have many chances to do this, let him feel while he can. “The kid,” he says, tearing up again. “The kid. He hates me, doesn’t he? I killed him. That’s why he didn’t want to become an Avenger; he knew I didn’t give a shit about him,”

Steve sighs. “Tony, you do realize that there’s nobody else in the world that kid adores more than you, right? He loves you, and doesn’t blame you in any way for what happened on Titan. You’re practically the greatest thing in the world to him. I know you have a lot to worry about, but believe me, that’s one thing you don’t have to. Worry about, I mean.”

Tony blinks. How does Steve do that? Pulls everything Tony had been overthinking and tormenting himself about, and set it all straight in a few lines? He sits up and wipes his face.

“I don’t know how you got all that from one word, but, um. Thanks. Exactly what I needed to hear.” He pulls away from Steve and starts remaking his bed. “That stupid kid. He goes out every day, risking his life, and I dunno. Just got to me today, I guess. Dunno why. Stupid kid.”

Steve smirks. “Who would have thought the great Tony Stark actually knew how to care for someone?” He yelps as Tony hits him with a pillow, “Sorry, I’m sorry Stark, for fuck's sake, you didn’t have to hit that hard.”

“Get the fuck out of my room then, Rogers. Some of us still need our beauty sleep.”

Steve laughs and gets up to leave, but not before hugging Tony one last time and asking him softly if he’s okay, if he needs anything.

Tony calls to him at him as he leaves. “Close the door when you’re leaving, Rogers.” Steve nods and moves to leave, but Tony isn’t done. “Also um, thank you. For everything tonight. I owe you one. Like if you need anything, I’ll do it.”

The smile falls off of Steve’s face. “Maybe you could just return the favor,” he mumbles, closing the door and leaving before either of them can register what he’s said.

 

*******

 

The fact that Steve was awake and ready to help Tony at 1 in the morning isn’t exactly surprising. He's always been the altruistic one, the mother hen of the group. After every battle, he was always the guy running around, checking up on his teammates and trying to fix any collateral damage. It's just Steve's thing. It's not surprising to anyone when, in the days after the Big Battle, Steve didn't take any time for himself, like everyone would expect him to do. He spent the first day in bed - even Captain America couldn't argue against doctors' orders - but since then he's been running around trying to fix any of the million problems they suffered post-Reversal-and-battle. Of course, his first concern was for his teammates - he helped them through the million and one injuries they'd suffered, kept them company when they had nightmares, and even spent an entire three hours with Clint (which, in Tony's opinion, was a task that took more energy than beating Thanos' entire army) when he had a mental breakdown remembering Natasha. Everyone has their own traumatic event they went through, and a few months are nowhere near enough for the memories to dull, especially for the Avengers who were dusted. Whatever they experienced when stuck in the Soul Stone left such an impression on them that, for the first few weeks after the reversal, you couldn't go five minutes without one of the snapped Avengers experiencing a nightmare or a panic attack. Steve was the guy everyone went to for help; because they knew he'd be there - good old, trusty, reliable Steve Rogers. Peter practically looked up to the man as a father at this point, after the millionth time waking up screaming in the middle of the night and finding Steve there gently embracing him and helping him calm down.

It's not just his teammates either. After everything has semi-calmed down, and the Wakandans and Asgardians have left the compound, Steve immediately goes out trying to help everybody else. His first thought is of people who have lost family and breadwinners in the battle. He helps them financially, trying to make up for taking away these families' only sources of income. He's more than generous (which is easy, since it's not his money, but Tony doesn't really mind, so) and keeps finding new causes to support and throw himself into. Like that one foundation for families who were torn apart after the Snap - Tony had never thought about it, but OF COURSE there were going to be children who came back and found out their parents had died in that five-year window, or parents who now had one or more extra mouths to feed, or people who came back and realized their spouses and significant others had moved on and married again.

Steve works with all of these foundations, giving his time, money and energy like it's nothing.  It's not uncommon for Tony to walk into the kitchen at 2 AM and find Steve puzzling over a budget error or trying to find more places to throw his philanthropist efforts into. He's putting so much of himself into this that it starts to annoy Tony. For fuck's sake, there are 7 billion people on Earth, 3.5 billion of whom directly owe their lives to the Avengers. Let some of them do all this work!

He confronts Steve about it maybe a month and a half after the battle, but Tony can't fault Steve for simply shrugging his shoulders and saying "It helps," when asked. Considering his own method to dealing with the PTSD is locking himself in his lab and working himself to death, he can't really say anything to Steve's coping mechanisms. At least he isn't self-destructive, and he's actually helping people, which is more than Tony can say about himself.

 

*******

 

After that disaster of a night, things get a little more awkward between Steve and Tony. They don’t actively try to avoid each other, and they certainly don’t bring up what happened, but there’s some definite awkwardness there. Tony doesn’t say anything, out of respect to Steve, but he finds himself spending more time around the guy. Not actively talking or doing anything, but just being in each other’s presence, especially when the rest of the team is there. And he puts together some things about Steve Rogers he’s never considered before.

1) His actual obsession with apologies. The guy had always been the definition of “polite and respectful”, but now he seems to be trying to set the world record for Guy Who Says The Word Sorry The Most. It can be any tiny thing; like when he accidentally bumped into Tony on his way to the kitchen, or when he tripped over Clint’s quiver. Never mind that it was Clint who’d left his shit lying around, which Tony has told him  _a million times_  not to do, and never mind that earlier Bruce had tripped over that very same quiver and broken an expensive vase that happened to unfortunately be in his path. Bruce had walked away swearing at everyone around, especially Clint and Tony (for keeping the vase in his walking path? Tony had no idea). Steve, on the other hand, showered everyone in the immediate vicinity with apologies, and then ran and hid in his room again. Which leads Tony to:

2) Why in the fuck is Steve always hiding in his room? Steve had always been the social one, the mama bear that made sure all the baby bears socialized. Somehow though, between Loki and Ultron and Zemo and Thanos, the baby bears all grew up and started doing their shit themselves and now it’s like Mama Bear has nothing to do besides skulk around in his cave. Okay, that metaphor wasn’t exactly the best thing Tony has ever come up with, but the point is still clear. Steve is almost constantly in hiding, which is seriously not normal. The Steve he knows always wanted to be around people. Tony remembers when, two weeks after the battle, Steve had come up to him and asked his to help find a place in Brooklyn. Tony had said something to the effect of “Fuck no Cap, you’re staying here, with everyone else, cause it’s safer for you and everyone, and goddamn you are not leaving me alone with these idiots.” He’d thought nothing of it at the time, but now…did Steve really want to move 2 hours away simply to avoid everyone, and not show his pretty face around? Speaking of which;

3) God, Tony couldn’t stop obsessing over Steve’s face. That beautiful, beautiful face that he’d somehow never noticed before. He didn’t know how, but somehow in the space of about three days, Tony went from wanting to smack Steve in the head to grabbing his face and kissing it,  _hard,_ until Steve couldn’t breathe anymore. Tony’s almost shocked at himself, not because he fell for the guy (he’s been aware of his sexuality for a long ass time), but for how  _quickly_  he fell. He’s never had a crush sneak up on him this fast; it’s like one moment he was normal, and the next: BAM! All he can think of is Steve. He’s almost inclined to blame Loki, but he knows even Loki wouldn’t be able to control his mind to this extent. Tony’s falling, hard, and he doesn’t know why or how. All he knows is he’s not going to do anything about his feelings, at least not right now. Both of them have enough to deal with at the moment than Tony’s stupid schoolboy crush. He’s going to join Steve at the gym from now on, though. And if he tries to sneak a few pictures of Steve working out, sweaty and shirtless, then that’s nobody’s business.

 

******

 

It’s 3 o’clock in the morning, and Tony thinks it might finally be time for him to leave his lab. He’s been working all day, and has barely eaten except for a couple of sandwiches and an endless supply of coffee, and his body is finally feeling the effects. He seriously needs some sleep. Sighing, he clears up the lab and shuts everything down before making a beeline to the kitchen to drop off the three crusty coffee cups scattered around the lab. He just wants to wash these up, take a shower, and collapse into his bed: bumping into Steve Rogers in their shared kitchen definitely wasn’t part of the plan.

Steve’s just sitting there, seemingly reading the open book on his lap, but Tony can tell even from where he is that Steve’s not doing any actual reading. He looks up when he sees Tony enter, and immediately rubs his face.

“Stark,” he nods, his voice low and gravelly and fucking hot.

“Hey, Captain. What are you doing awake this late?”

“I should be asking you that, Stark. Are you just going to bed? _Now?_ ”, he asks, and Tony smiles guiltily at him

“Some of us have actual work to do, Rogers. I still have a company to run, ya know?”

Steve smiles at that, and then turns his attention back to his book. Tony’s relieved; he’s not exactly in the mood for conversation either. He cleans up, and after deliberating for a moment, heats up some of the leftovers in the fridge. He’s tired, but sleeping on a full stomach is infinitely more pleasurable, and he can stand to wait a few more minutes.

Through all this action, Steve hasn’t said a word; in fact, he barely even seems aware that Tony is around. Tony takes his plate out of the microwave, and walks over to where Steve’s sitting. It’s dark in this part of the kitchen, how is the guy even reading in this light?

Tony plops his butt down next to Steve, and the supersoldier looks up, surprised.

“You should be asleep, Stark,” he says, not looking up

“I will. Let me just get some food into my system-”, Tony gestures towards the plate, “-and then I’ll be out like a light. Besides you’re one to talk, Cap. Why are you awake?”

Steve mumbles something along the lines of “Couldn’t sleep,” and turns to hide his face in the book again. However, in the few seconds his face was faced to Tony’s, Tony’s eyes have adjusted to the half-light and he can see what are quite obviously smudged tear tracks on Steve’s face.

“Cap? Are you… _crying?_ ’”

Steve looks up like he’s been shot. “What? No! No I wasn’t, it’s just the book, it’s very emotional, and I, uh-“

Tony rolls his eyes and peeks at the cover of the book. Steve immediately pulls it away, but Tony can tell it’s one of Peter’s textbooks that the kid keeps scattering around the Compound.

“Cap, if you’re going to lie about this, at least make it sound plausible?”

“Shut up, Stark.”

Tony looks directly into Steve’s eyes. “Cap. Talk to me here okay? What happened?” Steve looks away.

“It’s nothing, Tony. I swear, I just couldn’t sleep, and I kept thinking about stuff, and I somehow ended up here. It’s not a big deal.”

Okay, that’s it. Tony can’t do this anymore. “Rogers, for fuck’s sake, stop doing that, okay?”

Steve looks up, confused. “Doing what?”

“THAT! That thing you’re doing right now, where you pretend your problems don’t exist! And you sit there and lie about them! That’s not just bad, Cap, it’s an insult to my intelligence! You really think I wouldn’t be able to tell if something was wrong with you? I know you think the great Captain America needs to be all brave and stoic and shit, but taking care of yourself isn’t a sin, Cap.”

Steve just blinks down at him. “Tony,” he says, placing a hand on his shoulder, “are you okay?”

“What the hell? You’re not the one who should be asking that question right now, Cap.”

“Seriously, Tony, when was the last time you had a full eight hours of sleep? Is it…do you have trouble sleeping? Can I help you, or, I dunno, do something?”

Tony is _floored._ Like seriously, this is the most Steve thing to happen, ever. Only Captain America would worry about Tony’s sleeping habits when he’s clearly in the middle of something himself. And the bastard’s smart too, sneakily trying to change the subject like that. Luckily, Tony’s too smart and wise to fall for it.

“Steve, for once in your life, could you maybe stop worrying about the people around you, and worry about yourself?”

“I’m fine, Tony. You, though…you seriously need sleep.”

“See, this is exactly what I mean! STOP THINKING ABOUT ME, Cap! What happened with _you?_ Why the hell are you awake and crying at 3 in the morning?”

Steve scoffs. “Wasn’t crying,” he mumbles, before standing up. “You’re right, though. I should probably go back to sleep. You should too, Tony.”

Tony’s almost crying at this point. How hard is it to get a guy to open up a little, for fuck’s sake?

“Rogers, I swear if you walk away from me right now, I will follow you into your bedroom and fucking keep you awake all night.”

Shit, that sentence sounded so much better in his head (not that it doesn’t sound like a good idea now too, but. Priorities.) Steve must’ve picked up on it too, because he starts blushing like crazy. Tony immediately backpedals.

“Ah, shit, Cap, I didn’t mean it like that. Fuck,” he sits back down and rubs a hand over his exhausted face, “Just…don’t go yet okay? Stay with me a bit?”

Ah, the magic words. Immediately he’s back at Tony’s side, an arm around his shoulders, asking him repeatedly if he’s okay, if he needs anything. Tony smiles tiredly. Fucking Steve Rogers.

“Cap, I’m fine okay? Stop asking me. I’m not in any trouble or danger or distress or pain whatsoever. I asked you to stay for _you_.”

“Tony, I already told you I’m fine.”

“Is it so hard for you to believe that someone actually gives a shit about you and wants to help you out?”

“That’s not it Tony, you know it’s not.”

“Then what the hell is your problem with asking for help?”

“Cause I don’t need help with anything?”

“That’s bullshit, Rogers, and you know it. You might have super-strength, but you’re still human.”

“That’s my line Tony, stop stealing it.”

Tony wants to punch the guy in the face. How the _hell_ did he end up crushing on a guy this stubborn? “Deflecting isn’t going to work, Rogers. Like I said, I’m going to stick to you all night, and all of tomorrow if I have to, until you open that pretty mouth of yours and tell me what’s eating you.”

Steve, uncharacteristically, doesn’t have a reply to this. He pulls his arm away from Tony, and doesn’t say anything. Tony resists the urge to say anything, giving Steve time to process everything.

“it’s not a big deal, Tony,” he says, after almost two whole minutes of silence. “Honestly. There’s nothing important happening here.” He looks up at Tony, like it’s all happy and problem-solved now.

“It doesn’t matter how big a deal whatever it is is, Rogers. It’s still a problem.”

“Tony, look, I-” Steve cuts himself off, looking back down and playing with his fingers. “-I really don’t like talking about it. Or anything really. About me. You don’t have to waste your time here.” His voice goes softer and softer as he speaks, ‘til at the end it’s just a whisper. Even then, Tony can tell the man’s on the verge of tears again, and decides he shouldn’t go any further, at least not tonight.

He places his hand on Steve’s cheekbones, and pulls his face up so they’re looking each other directly in the eye, their faces two feet apart. “I’m not going to make you tell me anything you’re uncomfortable with, Cap. But I’m not leaving you alone. Not when you’re like this. Okay?”

Steve again, doesn’t say anything, but nods slightly in Tony’s hands. That’s good enough for Tony, who nods back and settles down at the other end of the couch, pulling out his phone, not saying anything else. Steve picks up his book and resumes his ‘reading’. Neither of them say another word to each other, but Tony finds himself in his own bed the next morning, neatly tucked in, and a little sticky note next to his bed with a “Sleep well, Tony ♥” scribbled on it.

Tony’s out of bed and dressed in less than ten minutes. Besides the fact that he’s weirdly energized (he checked, and he slept for _ten hours straight! Without waking up once!_ Steve must’ve drugged him, that’s the only explanation), he’s also very, Very mad at Steve.

Honestly, Tony needed to drag Steve down to the gym, and then knock some sense into him. Maybe make a new serum that just has liquefied common sense in it, and make Steve go through Rebirth again. There’s literally no other way for Tony to get anything through Steve’s stupid, thick (beautiful) head.

He leaves his room, fully intending to find and confront Steve Rogers, the rest of the world be damned. It doesn’t take him long to realize though, that he would need to revise his plan of action for the day. Steve is nowhere to be found, and after half an hour of hunting up and down the Compound, he doesn’t need to be himself to know that Steve’s avoiding him.

Tony collapses onto the nearest sofa. Screw this. If Cap doesn’t want to be found, Tony’s not going to waste his energy running after him like a lovestruck puppy. He has better things to do with his life.

 

*******

 

Tony has nothing better to do with his life. He’s run himself ragged the whole day; helping Peter out in the lab, training with the others, and catching up on what’s happening in the company (even if he doesn’t run it anymore, it’s still his name on the top of all the paperwork and branded on all the products, he wants to know what’s happening.) Even while he’s working himself to death, though, there’s always that nagging in the back of his brain going _SteveSteveSteveSteve_ like the world’s most annoying ticker tape. Honestly, it’s like being a teenager all over again. He ends up being more distracted than usual, and of course Peter picks up on it.

“Mr. Stark?” he asks tentatively, as they’re cleaning up. “I didn’t want to ask while you were surrounded by heavy metal stuff, but is everything ok-”

Tony cuts him off, waving his hand. “Yeah, yeah, kid, I’m great. Everything’s fine. Why do you ask?”

“You’d know if you let me finish,” he huffed, before continuing. “I was going to ask if everything was okay with you and Mr. Steve?”

Damn, the kid was perceptive. How the hell did he manage to pick up on that so fast?

“I mean, it could be the fact that when you walked in, you didn’t really say hi or anything, you just kept mumbling _Fuck Steve Rogers,_ ‘til I spoke up. Not that I mind if you want to do that, Mr. Stark, but uh, you’d probably want to discuss it with Mr. Steve first.”

Tony just wants a hole to open up in his floor and swallow him. Probably not the best idea, considering they’re about twenty stories up and a lot of people would be dead, but still. He’s just so _done._ “First off, kid, never talk about my sex life again, you get it? You’re too young for that stuff-” “I’M 18 MR. STARK!” “-and secondly, why is he Mr. Steve to you, but you can never call me Tony?”

“Because it’s just…weird, I guess?” says Peter, picking his stuff up and moving to leave. “You don’t call me Peter.”

“True that.”

Peter’s almost out the door before he turns around with a shit-eating grin on his face. “By the way, Mr. Stark, you never denied that you want to f- that you’re in love with Mr. Steve. I’m invited to the wedding, right?” he says, and leaves before Tony can throw something heavy at his head.

 

 

He’s had a tiring day. Even by his normal standards, he’s worked a lot more today than he has in a long time, and all Tony wants to do is stuff himself full of carbs and collapse in bed. Sadly, the rest of the team is up eating dinner, and he doesn’t really have the energy to deal with any more people today, so he stays locked up in the lab. As a bonus, he won’t need to meet Steve and deal with the inevitable awkwardness that would happen, especially with the rest of the team around.

What Peter said to him that day really stuck in his head. He _is_ in love with Steve, he realizes as he works, even if he doesn’t want to admit it to himself. Tony has had (both good and bad) experiences with crushes before, but he’s never cared about someone to this extent, ever. If he wasn’t in love, why did he give so much of a shit about Steve’s sleeping habits or whatever the hell the guy has going on in his life? Since when did he care about Steve any more than he cared for the rest of the team?

It’s almost 4 in the morning when he stops working and stewing over his thoughts, and looks up at the time. He cleans up and locks the lab down, and goes straight to his room. Food can wait. He needs _sleep._

He never gets it. When he enters his room, the first thing he sees is a large lump huddled uncomfortably on a corner of his bed. The lump moves when Tony turns on the light, and, oh what a surprise, it’s Steve.

Steve takes a moment to adjust to where he is, and then breaks into an unending string of apologies. “Ah, shit, Tony, I’m so sorry, I came in here looking for you, and you weren’t there, so I thought I’d wait for you, and I fell asleep I guess, it was an accident, I swear I wasn’t trying to be creepy or anything.”

Tony really can’t deal with this right now. “Calm down, Cap,” he says tiredly. “It’s not a big deal. You need to learn to chill a bit.”

Steve smiles. “Yeah, I know, you’ve told me before, sorry.”

Tony laughs at that. “There you go again,” he says, smirking at Steve and stripping out of his clothes. “Why did you say you were looking for me again?”

“I didn’t say.” His voice grows quieter, less smiley. “I wanted to apologize for yesterday. How I treated you.”

“How you…what?”

“You were being really nice to me, and I was being a complete dickhead in return. Nobody else would have given two shits about me sitting there, but you were trying to help me out, and I just… _ignored_ you like you weren’t even there, and anyway, I’m sorry.”

Tony is officially too tired for this. He walks over to sit next to Steve, pulling on a loose sweatshirt. “Cap, I’ve been awake for too long and I’m fucking tired, you’ll need to simplify this for me. What exactly did you do that’s so bad?”

Steve flushes, and Tony can see his ears are growing faintly red too. It’s adorable. “Don’t make me repeat all that, Tony.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong though, Cap. What exactly are you apologizing for, again?”

“For fuck’s sake, Tony, don’t tell me you weren’t mad at me yesterday. Or when you woke up.”

“Obviously I was mad, Rogers-”

“So that’s what I was apologizing for!”

“-but I get it! You don’t have to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, Cap, and, that includes talking to me. I should probably be the one apologizing, actually, if I made you feel pressured or anything.”

“I wasn’t uncomfortable, is the thing,” Steve says after a few moments. “At least, not with you.”

“Then why didn’t you want to talk to me?”

“I wanted to, Tony, god, I really wanted to. It’s just…it’s probably not worth it you know? Like, I could tell you were tired yesterday, and I didn’t want to bother you even more by talking about myself."

“Cap, I don’t know if they taught you this in the 1920s, but when someone tells you that you can talk to them, that generally means they wouldn’t be annoyed when you do exactly that.”

“That’s something people say when they want to be polite Tony, you know they don’t mean it.”

“And how would you know if I meant it or not, huh, Rogers? What are you, a fucking mind-reader now?”

“I…you’re Tony Stark! Why would you give even half a shit about me?!”

“Is it so hard for you to believe that people could actually care about you? I give more than half a shit about you, Cap, but I can’t help you if you’re going to sit there and refuse to see it!”

Both of them are breathing hard, almost yelling at each other. Tony’s fists are clenched, but he reaches out and grabs Steve’s hand, that’s sitting there doing nothing. Of course. Only Steve could remain this composed in the middle of an argument. Tony takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

“Steve, I swear, I’ll only ask you one more time and if you don’t want to answer, I’ll shut up and never ask you about this again. Are. You. Okay?”

Steve’s eyes grow comically big, and words start flowing out of his mouth like he has no control over them. “I…I know it’s been six months and I should be over this by now, but I can’t get the whole battle out of my head? It’s not the people who died or the fighting, it’s…I can’t stay anywhere near the others anymore, it feels like they’re all blaming me for letting Thanos get that far, for not stopping him in the first place when I had the chance. Whenever the team’s together, it’s like I can _feel_ how much they hate me. Or maybe hate is a strong word there, but everyone gives off very strong “Please stay away from me, Steve Rogers” vibes, and I don’t want them to hate me more, so I thought I could stay away from everyone and, y’know, at least not make everything worse.” Steve pauses to take a great, shuddering breath, and Tony remains quiet, still holding his hand. He doesn’t know how he got Steve to finally open up, but he’s not going to do anything to mess it up now.

“I was stuck inside for so long, and I couldn’t get this wave of sadness out of my head. Every time I thought to myself, _Today’s going to be a good day,_ or _You can do some productive shit today,_ or anything, I could never get the energy to do it, it was like most of my brain shut down and left only the sad part or whatever open. I couldn't sleep, because I was scared of what I’d see if I did, and when I’m awake I couldn’t stop thinking about how literally none of the team wants me around, and I don’t have anything useful to do anymore. The team was like my family since I came out of the ice, and being part of the Avengers is the only thing I know how to do, and then I lost both, and I had no idea what to do with my life anymore, I felt so fucking _useless,_ y’know? Worthless, even. I tried doing things outside, helping people, but all that did was remind me how much damage we caused, how much _I’m responsible for,_ and what’s the point? What’s the point of me even being alive? I’ve done everything I had to do, and now there’s no reason for me to live, not when I’ve done and caused so much shit. I’ve thought about it sometimes-” his voice drops to a whisper and Tony pulls the man into a hug, “-when I’m alone. How it would be to just…end it all. Not have to deal with this anymore. Not that I’d ever have the guts to do it, and I’d never leave you to clean up after me, but it would be nice. Not to be alive anymore.”

Steve shuts up abruptly, like he’s just realized how much he’s said. He doesn’t pull away from Tony, but he hides his face in his hands, and Tony can feel his body shaking under him. He shakes his head, getting trying to absorb everything he’s just heard. He looks at Steve in his arms, and his heart almost _breaks,_ right then and there. He doesn’t deserve all this pain. Tony’d known Steve had problems, that he wasn’t in the best state of mind, but he didn’t think it went this deep. Steve Rogers, this perfect, perfect human being, shouldn’t have to go through any of this.

“Is that why you wanted to move to Brooklyn?” Tony asks softly, feeling like an idiot, but also needing to say something. Steve nods slowly, his face still hidden in the pillow.

“I mean, I get your logic there, Cap, but that would’ve been a pretty stupid move.” Steve looks up from the pillow, glaring at Tony (unrelated, but Steve’s angry glare is the cutest thing Tony’s ever seen. It’s like looking at an angry kitten.) “I mean, no offense, but it’s not exactly smart to be alone when you’re having mental health problems.”

“I would have dealt with it,” Steve mumbles, before pulling himself up and out of Tony’s arms. “I…I’m really sorry about that. I dunno why I said so much, but I’m really sorry, I’ll just leave and let you sleep now-”

Tony quite literally facepalms. “For fuck’s sake, stop apologizing for once in in your life, and sit the hell back down. I’m not going to sleep now anyway, and we both know you won’t either.”

Steve surprisingly doesn’t fight him on this, and sits back down, blushing slightly.

“I’m still sorry though. This isn’t the best time for all that word vomit, god, I’m so sorry.”

“Cap, I asked for it, you _don’t have to apologize._ What made you suddenly want to talk to me anyway?”

Steve blinks and looks directly at Tony for the first time all night. “You called me Steve.”

Tony is confused. “What?”

“You called me Steve. ‘Steve, are you okay’, you said. You never called me that before. It felt like you were actually serious about this I guess? I don’t know, I was so shocked, I just started talking, fuck, I’m-”

“I swear to god Rogers, if I hear the word ‘sorry’ come out of your mouth one more time-”

“I won’t finish that sentence then,” Steve says, smiling. Tony feels like he’s in shock.

“Have I really never called you by your name before?” Steve shakes his head. “Well, shit. Twelve years, and I’ve never said it once. Wow. I’m a horrible friend.”

“It’s not a big deal, it just took me by surprise, honestly Tony, I never even noticed.” Tony doesn’t say anything, still lost in thought. Steve places a hand on Tony’s cheek, pulling his face so they’re looking each other in the eye.

“Stop overthinking this, Tony. It’s not a big deal, and not many people call me Steve anyways. Probably just Bruce and Bucky, and occasionally Fury, if he’s trying to butter me up.”

Tony lets out a small giggle. He very much likes this position, close to Steve’s face and with his huge perfect hands on Tony’s face. It’s very relaxing. He could stay like this forever, but he knows he needs to address the elephant in the room.

“Fucking Fury,” he says, before taking a deep breath and continuing on. “Look, I’m really sorry I didn’t help you out with all this earlier. I knew you were struggling with something, and I let you deal with it alone, and I’m sorry. Nobody should have to go through that alone. After this, you can _talk_ to me, okay? I’m always there for you, Steve.”

What happens next probably only takes a couple of seconds, but Tony swears later he can remember every frame, every millisecond in perfect detail. He sees Steve’s eyes dilate and flick down to Tony’s lips, he notices Steve shift his hand so it’s on his chin, he feels him slowly pull Tony’s face towards him until their lips are pressed together.

They stay in the same position, unmoving, until Tony’s senses catch up with him, and he pulls away, scrambling towards the end of the bed. His brain is officially too confused; he has no idea what just happened. Steve, on the other hand, is mortified.

“Fuck, Tony, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that, I don’t know what happened, fuck, shit, I’m so sorry, shit…”

The man is working himself into a full-blown anxiety attack, and even in Tony’s mixed-up state, he realizes he needs to stop him from going any further. He grips Steve’s wrists and looks him directly in the eyes, trying to ground him. He rubs Steve’s back with his other hand, until his breathing evens out slightly.

“You really have a thing for me saying your name, huh, Cap?” he says lightly, trying to get Steve comfortable again. To his surprise, he doesn’t disagree.

“I’m so sorry Tony. I…it just sounded so good when you said it, and you were so close…” he trails off and shrugs his shoulders, and Tony can tell he’s embarrassed.

“Aww, Steve, that’s adorable,” he teases, and Steve groans and hides his face in his hands.

“Don’t do this to me, Tony.”

He looks so freaking adorable like this, all vulnerable in Tony’s bed, Tony can’t deal with this anymore. Might as well shoot his shot now, while they’re in this good-ish place together.

“If calling you Steve makes you kiss me, I’ll never call you anything else,” he says, smirking at Steve, feeling his heart beat rapidly inside his chest. Steve looks up, with that adorable confused puppy face. Tony wants to eat him up.

“I…what?”

Tony pulls closer to him, praying this won’t go horribly wrong. “Kiss me, Steve,” he says, his voice low. For a few horrible moments, Steve doesn’t move, and Tony’s heart sinks. “Only if you want to, it’s okay if-” Before he can finish the sentence, Steve’s mouth is on his, and the two of them are kissing each other like teenagers.

Tony can’t focus on anything but the sensation of Steve, Steve everywhere. Steve’s lips pressed to his, his hand on Tony’s neck, his entire body weight pressing against Tony. He’s never felt so good in his life; he could die right now, and he’d be happy.

When they finally pull away from each other, panting and breathless, Tony pulls Steve into a proper tight hug before he can start spewing out apologies again. Both of them relax into the touch, staying pressed together until Tony pulls away.

“That was nice. We should do that more often.”

“I didn’t think you’d want to,” Steve says slowly, his body slowly slipping away from Tony’s. “Why would…do you want to?”

“Cap, I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to.”

Tony looks over at Steve and sees the question Steve’s not asking. He sighs, pulling Steve closer and refusing to let go.

“I was going to wait ‘til we slept and were properly rested to give you the talk, but…Steve, no one in this place wants you gone, okay? Nobody here finds you annoying, or hates you, or whatever else you’ve convinced yourself you are. The team’s honestly worried about you, no one thinks you’re as worthless as you seem to think you are. Least of all me.” He presses his forehead to Steve’s, lowering his voice to a whisper. “ _Especially_ not me. God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted this, Steve. How long I’ve wanted _you._ You’re the most beautiful, amazing person I know. Don't ever, _ever_ tell me you're worthless, Rogers, not when I can get Thor here with his stupid hammer and prove you wrong in half a second. Your heart is probably bigger than your biceps, you’re amazing on the field, and most of all, Peter loves you. I’ve learned by now to trust his judgement.” Steve giggles into his his neck, and Tony smiles with him, because, fuck yeah he made Steve Rogers laugh, and it feels _so good._

“I know it’s not easy to get invasive thoughts like that out of your head, Steve, and fuck, you shouldn’t have had to deal with that for so long. It’s going to be hard for you, but I swear, Steve, I’ll be with you the whole time. Don’t ever ask me _why_ , okay? It’s because you’re fucking worth it, and I’ll remind you of that every single day, if you can’t feel it yourself.”

Tony sees the tears slide down Steve’s face, and gently kisses them away. He pushes Steve down into the bed, not letting him say anything. He knows Steve won’t mind staying over, but he still asks. It’s almost sunrise, and they’ll need to wake up in a couple of hours, but they need at least a little sleep after all that happened. Steve simply nods, still overwhelmed, so Tony cleans up a little and turns off the lights, before climbing back into bed.

He lies down facing Steve, not cuddling, but too close to each other to be platonic. Tony drifts off as soon as his head hits the pillow, but he vaguely registers Steve kissing his forehead and whispering “Thank you” into his ear before he falls asleep.

 

**********

 

Tony walks around on a bubble of happiness for the next few weeks. He feels like a child again, high off the rush of his relationship, but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about _anything._ How can he, when he’s so happy?

Steve is genuinely one of the best things that has happened to Tony in a long time. He’s forgotten how good it feels to sleep with someone else at night. Even if they’re not doing any fun stuff, Tony sleeps so much better with Steve’s warm body cuddling up to him. He feels safe, protected, _loved,_ something he hasn’t felt in a long time. The fun stuff is also good: who knew that Captain America - the symbol of an entire nation, the country’s golden boy - could be so damn incredible in bed? They fuck like teenagers, whenever and wherever they can do it without being caught. (Captain America has a lot of kinks, as Iron Man finds out, but voyeurism isn’t one of them,) and Tony can very definitively say he’s never had better sex in his life. In fact, their entire relationship makes Tony feel like a teenager, blissfully happy and high off of his love for Steve.

He doesn’t let his happiness interrupt Steve’s mental health, though. Now that they’re together, he can see exactly how affected Steve has been for the last few months, and vows not to let it continue. He searches for days to find a good therapist, someone with experience with both depression and PTSD, someone who Steve will trust. When he does find one, it’s another struggle to make Steve go (“I don’t have a mental illness, Tony! I’m just a worthless idiot! You don't need to waste your time on me!” “That sentence right there is exactly why you should go!”) but Tony is respectful of his boundaries, and doesn’t force him, until he agrees to go himself. He’s making progress now, and Tony is genuinely proud of his boyfriend (fuck, it feels so good to say that) for taking this step.

There’s still bad days, of course; days when all Steve wants to do is hide in their room and not leave, or when he refuses to go out with or kiss Tony, because he feels like he’s worthless and annoying. Every single time, it breaks Tony’s heart to see Steve this way. He would do anything to keep his boyfriend happy and safe and loved, but he can’t put an Iron Man suit over Steve to protect him now; not when the damage is from Steve himself. Tony makes sure to stay with Steve on his bad days, grounding him with soft touches, and whispering compliments into his brain, trying to combat everything Steve thinks about himself. Steve always ends up apologizing for these episodes, but Tony doesn’t mind. He’d never mind; if Steve feels safe when he’s around, that’s enough for Tony.

 

 

The rest of the team don’t pick up on their relationship until two weeks later, when they walk into breakfast together, Tony with a noticeable limp. Nobody picks up on it, until Peter falls off his stool, shouting “Holy shit!” He gets up, eyes wide, and looks around at the others who happen to be in the kitchen (Clint, Bruce, May, and Wanda) to see if they’ve noticed. Clint and Bruce have, and are smirking into their coffees, while May and Wanda are standing there, very confused. Peter has to spell it out for them “MR. STARK AND MR. STEVE! THEY’RE TOGETHER! LIKE, ‘TOGETHER’ TOGETHER!” Their eyes widen as it clicks.

“Seriously?” Clint asks, sipping on his coffee. “Well shit, congrats, I guess. You needed to get laid a long time ago, Tony.” He ducks as Tony swipes at his head, while Steve stands there, blushing hotly. “I’m sorry, but it’s true!”

“Who cares about whether it’s true or not, Barton, there’s kids in here!’

“Mr. Stark, I’m not a kid! I’m 18!” Peter pauses, a glint in his eye. “18, which means I’m legally old enough to do the same things you and Mr. Steve were doing all night.”

Tony chokes on the banana he had just bitten into (how appropriate) and glares at Peter, who’s high-fiving Clint, while Bruce is howling with laughter on the island. Wanda is just standing there confused, while May seems torn on whether to laugh or yell at Peter. Steve, of course, just looks like he’s trying to win a Human Tomato competition.

“I thought I told you not to talk about my sex life, kid!”

“He didn’t have much to talk about ‘til right now anyway,” drawls Clint. “Wait, um, how long have you guys been…?”

“Two weeks.” Tony scowls. He grabs a banana and Steve’s hand, ready to leave the kitchen. Before he can, though, his face is filled with a head of fluffy brown hair.

“I’m really happy for you, Tony,” Peter says quietly, so Steve can’t hear, from where he’s hugging the older man. Tony can tell he’s being sincere; the kid never calls him ‘Tony’ unless he’s really emotional. “Honestly, you've been really lonely for a long time. And the way you kept staring after Mr. Steve was kind of sad.” Tony huffs. Why did he bring this kid into their lives again? “But you look really happy now, and I noticed you that way for the past two weeks, I didn’t want to ask why. But you’re happy, so it’s cool.” Peter pulls back to whisper in Tony’s ear, “And if Mr. Steve does anything to you, I’m always ready to kick his ass for you again.”

Tony grins and pulls Peter into a proper hug. God, he loves this kid. He places a kiss on Peter’s head, and the boy pulls off him to hug Steve. Tony watches them, the two people he loves the most in the world, and thinks, _Yeah. I could get used to this._

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't realize 'til I was editing it, but Steve most likely has some kind of anxiety disorder. If he was a little annoying in this fic, chalk it up to that.
> 
> Thank you to anyone who read this, I dunno how far stories on here reach, so. Thank you so much for reading this, and if you shared it around, or left a comment, thank you much more! I doubt I'll be writing much more, but if you guys have prompts or requests, you can always leave those down too.
> 
> Again, thank you so much, and I love you guys 3000!


	2. Chapter 2

This isn't an extension of the story or anything, but I just wanted to thank you guys, and every who'll read this fic in the future, for the kudos, comments, hits and everything else. This was my first story on here, and the first major thing I've written, and the amount of support I've gotten is incredible. Thank you guys so much, honestly, for everything.


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